Thursday, 26 September 2013

IVF, the role of the daddy

IVF, the role of the daddy

The process of infertility treatment requires a great degree of patience and mental strength. Not only for the couple that is undergoing the treatment, is it equally challenging for entire unit working for it in my team. Although I try to remain as neutral as possible during the treatment because it is necessary at my end, but still there are moments of distress and enjoyment that affect me up to some extent.

It is a fact that infertility treatment procedures and IVF primarily require physical and mental involvement of the female. However, participation of the father is equally necessary in relieving the stress of would be mother. It makes the relationship stronger and makes the bonding stronger. The couple feels more invested in the pregnancy.

There are various benefits of the involvement of husbands in the IVF process. I have detailed discussion with every couple during and after infertility treatment and try to understand their perception about the whole experience. We chat, discuss and analyze the phases we passed through together. There are a few feelings that come out prominently:

Feeling of pride: For husbands, it is certainly a matter of pride being the caretaker of the wife. They feel good reminding about the medication, accompanying her for the ultrasounds, making her comfortable for the procedure. The sense of responsibility and sharing shown by the husband makes IVF procedure a wonderful experience. The final outcome brings a wonderful feeling of involvement and accomplishment and it is beyond expression.

Feeling of involvement: IVF is a long running process and it is extremely important that the couple traverses through it jointly. A husband feels tremendously involved in the process by going through every phase along with the wife. The involvement brings closeness and he feels endowed in the complete experience with a better control over it. The fathers see every step of pregnancy and right from the stage of placing the embryo in the womb to the delivery of the baby, they witness every step. Husbands call the period of IVF treatment as period of highest attachment.

Feeling of togetherness: I have seen immense improvement in the relationship between the husband and wife during the infertility treatment and IVF procedure. There are very obvious reasons behind it. The process brings extreme closeness and togetherness between both of them. Most importantly this is not my perception, but I hear it straight from the horse's mouth!

Feeling of responsibility: The couple has to take too much pain and labor in achieving successful pregnancy. The involvement makes the husband aware about the difficulty and discomfort faced by the woman during the process. It makes the fathers more responsible towards the baby.

It is a good trend that nowadays husbands are eager to participate in the process of creation of a new life. They want to feel the difficulty and take their share of responsibility. Undoubtedly the physical discomfort would be suffered by the wife, they can share the mental distress at least!


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  2. Thank you very much for addressing the impact that infertility and the ART process has on marriage and ways couples to help one another through it.