Wednesday 4 January 2012

Top tips on coming out to your kids for Gay Dads - Ivf Centre Delhi

  • Make sure you are confident and positive when you tell them and that you do so in a relaxed and calm atmosphere.  The less you make of it, the less they will think it is something to be upset about.
  • Tell your child in a private area where the conversation can’t be overheard.
  • Make sure you tell your child, rather than letting them find out from someone else.
  • If possible, try to include your child’s other parent(s) in the discussion.  Your child will be reassured if he or she can see that all parents are supportive.
  • Stress that your relationship with your child will not change in the light of you coming out.  Make sure they know that you love them and that you are just the same as you were before
  • If you are considering separating or divorcing from your wife, don’t tell your child both pieces of news at the same time.  It may overwhelm them
  • Let them know that they are no more likely to be gay just because you are
  • Talk to your child in age-appropriate language.  Children understand love and affection
  • Make sure they understand what you are comfortable with them telling people at school and in the playground.  Explain that there are lots of different types of families but respect your child’s wishes on the topic.  If they don’t want to tell their classmates or friends, that’s okay
  • Listen to your child and try to understand what their concerns are, if they raise any
  • Make sure your child knows that you are happy to talk to them about this topic.  Different children take different amounts of time to come to terms with change, and so it’s important for them to know that there is no pressure for them to respond in a particular way.  Also, try to keep the conversation open
  • Talk with them about sexual orientation in general.  Many gay parents use this as a starting point for coming out to their children
  • Try to provide opportunities for your child to talk to other people with gay parents.  This could be through LGB family networking groups or even through online message boards.